Patty Got the following in her e-mail:
ATTENTION ALL DOGS!!! THE FOLLOWING ARE IMPORTANT INSTRUCTIONS FOR EVERY DOG TO KNOW...
Instructions for properly hugging a baby:
1. First, spy a baby.
2. Second, be sure that the object you spied was indeed a baby, by employing classic sniffing techniques. If you smell baby powder and the wonderful aroma of wet diapers, this is, indeed, a baby.
3. Next you will need to flatten the baby before actually beginning the hugging process.
**Note: The added slobber should help in future steps by making the "paw slide" easier.
4. The "paw slide" - Simply slide paws around baby and prepare for possible close-up.
5. Finally, if a camera is present, you will need to execute the difficult and patented "hug, smile, and lean" so as to achieve the best photo quality.
Dogs, if this is properly done, it will secure you a warm, dry, climate-controlled environment for the rest of your life.
Good luck to all of you!